This post’s a bit whiny and personal, and for that I apologise.
“In the melting winter’s snow,
the fire burns soft and low.
A mother rocks within her chair,
while children sleep under her care.”
~ © Rose, December 2009.
For me, the holiday and family season is over. I left friends in Brighton, came home for a week to see a friend in my home town. I spent time with my husband and his parents for Yule, Xmas day at my grandparents house, boxing day with the husband and many of his relatives and then 27th with my Grandparents on my mother’s side.
They don’t understand that I do Yule, and the monthly anniversary with my husband [26th]. I can’t exactly express my feelings; that I come home to be closer distance from my husband; my family would be offended and I’m not one to cause harm for no reason. It’s just where my priorities lie during this long-distance relationship.
Now it’s the evening of the 27th December and I have no reason to stay. I’ll be home alone come 11:59pm on New Year’s Eve and I won’t see my husband until likely February now: for my first kiss of 2010. This is a bit of a shock; I didn’t know this until the 23rd and had expected at least that we’d have a little more time together before he went back.
I’ve another two full weeks here before I’m back with Ant, Emerald and Yana in Brighton, and due to the nature of my family [and I’m working on the 6th January], I can’t leave earlier. I get on with my mother, and the cats are wonderful company, but there’s no reason for me to be here. I’ve got 5,000 words of assignments to complete and I’d love to read some books, to exercise and I need to install Windows 7; which I received for Xmas.
But I don’t want to be here. I want a night to eat junk food in my room, to chill out with a movie or a day to go to the beach. Instead, I’m sharing the house with my father and having to eat what’s cooked for me.
I guess I best get started on those last two sock creatures and call it a night, before I get too caught up in situations I can’t control. After all, this year is about focus; and I’m aiming mine at the positive.
Have a wonderful and safe holiday season, take care in the snow/ice and be blessed. This is the time of year for gratitude and planning, and I wish you all well.