Solstice

Well, it’s been busy around here; although I still find hours where I have nothing to do. Kind of lost my motivation again. I guess that’s partly why I’m re-reading those trilogies. The women escape from problems and find themselves in a beautiful place; they find home. The novels explore the journey and hurdles they face. It feels like travelling with these women just prepares me that little bit more for when I make my own journey.

I’ve been very focused lately on pride vs. selfless acts. Something happened with my other half, and my first thought was to be there for him. When he didn’t need me as much as I had prepared, I felt almost useless.

And then I scolded myself for being so selfish.

But how does one stop selfish thoughts, without selfless ones turning into a matter of pride?

I’m hoping that once I get out there and face the world, I’ll realise how far I’ve gone over the line of self-love, and see the reality.

Enough negative self talk.

I didn’t even notice that it was the summer solstice this year. It’s usually one of those one I really work on – I’ve got a specific top I wear to celebrate it, and I always take a few pennies and glitter with me for the Fae.

This year, I went shopping with a friend from college. We had a meal at perfect pizza, which is one of the things I panic over – going out for meals. It was quite enjoyable though. I bought a black corset from Ann summers; a well-known shop for sex toys and clothes. (www.annsummers.com)

This is just a black corset though, honest.

So that’s my little present to myself for the solstice.

I hope everyone’s enjoying themselves as summer kicks in.

Stars Above,

Celestial Rose.

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One comment

  1. Happy summer!
    The corset is cute, and this soltice was similarly un-inspiring to us here. We got invited over to a friend’s house for a cookout, and otherwise failed to do my normal bonfire or drum-circle stuff. Still, the wheel of the year turns ’round again, and (at least here) the hot weather’s smacking us in the face.
    No doubt about it, rituals or no, it’s summertime!
    My opinions regarding selfishness/pride: only you can answer the question of where the line is. Your first instinct towards your special one was to help, and I believe That is not selfish. It was only after-wards did you feel guilty about it and your brain started second-guessing your heart with the possible “misplaced energy” (of course I don’t know the situation nor do I need to, just reading into the little snippet you wrote there)…. Focus on the loving helpfulness your heart felt, and tell your brain that just because you didn’t get to help as much as you planned for, does not mean you were being selfish. 🙂
    In magic[k], it’s the intention of our spells that counts. And I’m guessing that in pre-helpful planning your intentions were quite good. It’s only the rational part of our minds that starts with the guilt and similar thoughts afterwards. Simply dismiss them as unhelpful, and eventually, they slow down a bit. (but I suspect they’ll never completely quiet down, or I’d be the next buddah!)
    Be proud that you thought to help to begin with, and not started to feel “Geez, now I need to readjust my plans to go help this guy”. Does that make your thoughts sound more loving? I hope so, because it’s true.
    Fireflies above, 🙂
    -Maebius

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